*♥* goiNg sTroNg aNd sTroNgeR *♥*

Tuesday, August 16, 2011
4:19 PM

ello...haben been blogging for the longest possible time..and yes, its like near 2mths already...hurhurhur...one of the longest time since i left my blog left untouched...been bz with wrk and also, the last r/s with me n steven realli took a toil outta me...and its till like recently, then i finally decided to realli let it go...n to be honest, after deciding it, then i finalli managed to have a good night's rest..guess u guys will be curious in why i actualli wanna let it go..its actualli cox he actualli said...tht finalli made me had the courage to realli let things go after near 2mths of struggling and thinking n hoping and wishing that we might have a chance back tgt again...or maybe its me telling myself that yes, maybe one day, he'll be mine again...i have no idea and i guess everything aint impt anymore...

this was the short conversation tht we both exchanged...damn short actualli...it was just like an exchange of me telling him wad i felt and then he replying me n stabbing me straight into my heart...to be honest, when i read that apps, i felt the remains of the heart totalli shattered..n i guess, its realli cox of this apps tht he gave me finalli tore me up n made me let it go completely...things that he told me before that..tht we wont knw what will happened in the future were somehw all bullshits i guess...n times when he apps-ed calling me Baby n etc...haih...aniwae, somehow in a wae or another glad bah..i would sae...yes, no doubt being with him for the short 4mths was nice, i was realli happi cox he realli treated me good n i realli realli tot tht he will be the one for me..but earlier on, looking back at wad Yong told me shortly aft me n him broke off, Yong told me that he's somehow glad that we aint tgt animore cox he saes that Steven isnt someone who wanna settle down n that he shldnt waste my time if he doesnt have the intentions too...cox he felt that i was a nice gal n yes, being with him then, i realli had the tot of settling dwn n starting a whole new future with him...n into our r/s, we were looking at engagement rings, going down to furniture stores*part of his job as well*.. looking around n i'll alwax tell him what i want in our plc..we'll argue abt the color of the sofa that we both want..the fabric and the design of it....he brought me to meet up with his 'brothers'..and most impt, brought me over to pay respect to his grandparents and auntie..3 of whom he treasured dearly most of his heart....n tht was wad tht made me think that we were somehow meant for each other...he kept his promise abt accompanying me to my doc's appt despite his wrking schedule..n accompanied me to sit through n listened to what the doc's had to sae n etc...he tolerated my nonsense as not many pple will be able to do that...n most imptly, i knw that he did loved me...

but i guess for now, i realli have to agree with him, when things aint meant to be, the only choice left is to simply let it go...n this time round, even when typing this blog out, seriously, it doesnt hurt that much already..only a tiny pinch of hurt of i feel...and as what i wrote in my FB..."一切将重新开始。。。" i realli just wanna let u go n start everything afresh again....n as what u said earlier on, nobody knws what will happen in the future, but for nw, i knw im sure that i'll be able to go through things well alone.. =) realli thanks for everything, from the bottom of my heart...maybe someday, somehow, our paths might cross again, but for now, thankful that our path met but just that ultimately, u decided to turn the other way different from mine...

my PerFeCt LifE-`.